Fr Ennio Mantovani SVD 15 of sins, however, for the grievous ones, for those putting one outside the Christian community, one needs to ask and to officially be readmitted to the community. This is the ecclesial aspect of the sacrament. For me personally, this understanding of penance, as a renewal of my commitment to Christ and his mission is very meaningful and satisfying. Sacrament of Matrimony Marriage, in my opinion, given the fact that most Christians have been baptised as children, is the missionary sacrament par excellence. Once I was told: If I sleep with my partner just before going to church to be married, I commit mortal sin, I need to go to confession before going to Communion, and, if I die on the way to the church, I go to hell because in mortal sin. However, if I do the same a few minutes after the ceremony in church, everything is ok. There is no sin. The God, who, a short time earlier would have punished me with hell, now is pleased. The sacrament has purified the sexual act. It is not love that is at the centre but sex. This is a caricature of a sacrament. I see marriage differently. In a position paper I gave at the combined bishops conferences of our Pacific area in Sydney in May 1980 prior to the Synod on the Family, I presented my understanding of marriage as the renewal of Baptism in the context of marriage. The Nuncio privately warned me, that if the bishops did not raise the question, he would object that I did not distinguish enough between Baptism and Marriage. In the afternoon discussion, a woman – for the first time, lay people took part in the bishops’ conference – stated that she has been married for a few years. Before marriage, she was very active in her parish and after marriage, she and her husband continued their commitment. However, she felt uneasy. She had kept up her work but something was amiss. Three years after being married, one day it dawned on her that now she could not serve the mission of the Church as she did before, as a single woman. She was married, two in one, one flesh with her husband. They had to serve the mission of the Church as a couple, not as two individuals. That was an entirely different ball game, she said. I looked across at the Nuncio but he kept his head down. The couple had confirmed my understanding. In Baptism we give our life to Christ to work for the Kingdom, to help Christ establish God’s Kingdom here on earth. Marriage, for every culture is a turning point for the individuals involved and for the community as well. Most cultures express this fact through appropriate ceremonies involving very often appropriate instructions for those getting married. One takes on new and greater responsibilities for the community. One becomes an adult. It is not the question of a sexual expression of love that offends God. On the contrary, God appreciates that marital union so much as to want to use it to change and save the world. In this missionary view of marriage, it is not the sinfulness that is stressed, but its beauty and relevance for the mission of Christ. It is the implicit or explicit refusal to live one’s baptism in and through that marital union, the implicit or explicit refusal to allow Christ to use that union as a visible and efficacious sign for the Kingdom that puts a Christian outside the Church. Nowadays this understanding might give us a better foundation for rethinking the love of people with same-sex attraction. In Christian marriage, the couple allows Christ to use that union as a building block for the Kingdom. Their union ought to be a witness to the love of Christ for the Church, and of God for the world. The Christian marriage is not better or superior to other marriages, but is one where one consciously lives that witness. The Christian In Christian marriage, the couple allows Christ to use that union as a building block for the Kingdom. Their union ought to be a witness to the love of Christ for the Church, and of God for the world.
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